ini yang terakhir..kalau jadi apa2 jugak..aku redha Ya Allah..aku sudah tahu apakah ertinya gmbira dan sedih..dan aku lbih plih untuk sedih..biarlah aku sdih d dunia ini..mungkin aku akan gmbira di sana..Ya Allah..hanya Engkaulah yg Maha Mengetahui..

someone?
utk ari sblum neh...ada..
tp utk ari neh...x dk
ari neh n akan dtg
x dk
honest dh tu


....i keep this line as a reminder 4 me..of who i am...

Ya Allah..

aku pasrah dan aku redha Ya Allah..sesungguhnya semuanya ketentuanMu..hanya Engkau jua yg Maha Mengetahui..

=(

..................

when the time that i gain my strength...and loving her..she left me again..and yahh..i cried again..when the time the heart is so fragile..it can easily being.....i dont know..

tears=(

again.....

tonite...i feel like crying again..but as usual the tears wont come out...everytime i feel like giving up..theres always smething that makes me still holding on..they said that if we truly love someone..go get them..it not that i didnt try..i'm still trying..and i dont want to give up..but she didnt actually gives me any choice..i want to cry...i want to cry so badly...i dont want to hold this pain anymore..i loves her with all my breath..but....some said that if we truly love someone we should pray for their happiness eventhough they are without u..i dont want to do that..i dont know whether i can accept it..can u even imagine everyday u have to lied to urself saying that everythings gonna be ok and that u are okay..how long i want to live like this..i want to make things better again..but.....i dont even have any chance..how could i want to even try..i'm sad..truly i am..no matter how happy i am in the end..i would end up being sad...KAU TERCIPTA UNTUKKU..i want to dedicate this song to her..but i didnt even get any chance..they said that u cant live in the present if u keep dwelling in the past..but actly the past is the one that wont let us go..so how we suppose to move on..i'm writing as she could read this..well at least i'm hoping..'mungkin ini mmg jalan takdirku'-cinta dalam hati-..hmm...myb the time had alrealy came..ok i'm crying..=(((((...u take a good care of urself okay..if u are sick please take the medicine..take care of ur health..

=(((just so u know..i love u till the very end~

..............

i dont know why..sriusly i dont know..this feeling..this sad feeling..its making me weak rite now..i really wish the she would know what do i feel rite now..but i realised it is impossible..thats wht makes me more sad..i tried to smile...but the heart wont follow the lips at all..sometimes the heart does not listen to the mind..we keep thinking positive but ony God knows how we suffer inside..u tried to be strong..you keep telling urself that everythings gonna be ok..but for how long can u lied to urself..the more u tried to deny..the stronger it becomes..and the more u will suffer then..everyday u live ur life with the little hope that was given..u know that it is the hope that kills u but still u want to hold on to the hopes because its the only thing that gives u strength to move on..i cant keep the sadness anymore but the tears wont just come out..this is really hurt..u would never know until u feel it urself..hmm.. the choice is up to u...u can be a better person..dont ever let it conquer u..but u conquer urself..just keep telling urself..that everything gonna be ok..

tears again=((

OMG

sriusly?..i cant hold on anymore...i cant bear all this burden anymore..for all the time that i've stood up against..its gone now..i dont know what to say anymore..all i know..i just couldnt take it anymore..i'm leaving..Dear God..please..give me strength to go through this..i'm very weak right now..i want to do well in my exam..but in condition like this..i dont really have the confidence...please..please..please God..help me to move on...

tears rolling~=(

somEthInG thAt wE caLL LIFE..

hmm..u know wat...not evrything have a happy ending...things doesnt always goes the way we want it to be rite...well...sometime it made me think that maybe its just the way it should be...u know...i've tried my bes to make it better..but like i said...not always a happy ending...yahh..its kinda sad though..but i'll live...

wats the point pretend to be someone that u're not...sometimes feel left out..sometimes feel out of place...well maybe..it just the way it is..theres no need to be sad..i'm trying to make myself human..i'm trying to develop myself..myb this is just one way to achieve it eyh..hmmmm....

well..i'm a man that full of secrets...who likes to keep everything just for me..kinda hard..but again..i'll live..let it just be me whos trying so hard..no matter wat coming through me..i'll just face it with a smile...and maybe..i'm not good enough..yaaa..MAYBE...but i'll try my best...but sure theres no need to be pretend to be someone that u're not along the way rite..haha...yaaa...i get it now...well..time to cut the crap la...till nex time yaa...daaa~

juSt sOme wRitinGs...

bila mulut mula membisu,
berkata pula hati kecilku,
saat dikau pergi berlalu,
hatiku sedih bertambah pilu.

ketahuilah sayangku bahawa,
hanya dirimu jua yang amat ku cinta,
hanya satu yang ku pinta,
terimalah diriku apa adanya.

namunku sedar siapa geranganku,
ibarat insan pergi berlalu,
tiada siapa tahu kewujudanku,
di tengah lautan ditiup bayu.

mereka melihat aku ketawa,
namun hatiku tidak berkata,
aku curahkan keringatku sejuta,
cuma setompok kasih ku pinta.

kebahagiaan ku cari tiada lagi,
cuma air mata menemani diri,
teman ku mohon merawat sepi,
agar hidup ceria kembali.

-taken from a piece a heart-

losT???....

lOsT??...

hahaha..today realy got crazy la..haha...okeh..so here's the story..today..i msej cep gtaw nak p tasik darulaman..then he reply..ok ja..masa tuh mayb around 4 o'clock..then i get ready...start dat car and went to cep's house...haaa...then we went there by highway...

then after lepas tol kt alor star tu..there was two junction u know...left one went to bukit kayu hitam or alor star..straight one lead to pendang...i don know which way..so i ask la cep..which way to go...he said he don know..so i pon kinda cuak la..haha..then i went straight..haa...thats when it start to lost..i shud be taking left actlly...haha...

then trus punya trus..smpy sesat dlm 15 mnit aku drive..then cep kol his fren..he said me already mis the first turn..then i got panic la...then cep said to make u-turn at gurun..so i pon made la u-turn..then straight again..we asked that kakak yg jaga tol tu..seb bek on da way gak..straight pya straight smpy bndar darulaman..smpy2 myk plak abeh...after smpy at da tasik...we went usha2..haha...then minum,..pastu blek kui 7...gila taw..p kui 4.30 then smpy tasik 2 6.30..TWO HOURS u know lost!!...hahaha...smpy tasik got not enough time to walk around..ciss..pabeh myak ja...haha...then kui 7 balek....we balek kot jalan lggar ja..xbrani ikot highway da..hahaha...before balek stock some fuel..crazy ahh...money talks on da way...caaiisshh...huhu...hmm..after balek i sent cep home..theni went home..well..thats the story for today..till nex time yaa...daaa~